Alexa Chung's collection

Well, I love her collection. Time to hit the fabric store or the flea market again I guess :)

Believe it or Not : Success is the Best Revenge

Sure. We all have heard this: Success is the best revenge. Or, the best revenge is to accomplish what others say you cannot. Which version have you heard?  I have heard the two of them. But what is tingling in my mind is; what if I don't want to prove anything? What if revenge is not the case here? I once, was in a relationship that drawn me to this situation where people say all kinds of phrases- with the same meaning; prove them wrong! 

There was a time when people hesitating the ability of my siblings and I to get up on our own, paying for our own education, get a decent job, fix the house and settling in. No need to get into details on that, but what we want to stress out here is-  what we have accomplished to this day (and yes there is a long winding road to go out there awaits) has NOTHING to do with revenge.
It is what we have believed and always believe in. It is an ongoing effort of perseverance, hard work, discipline and the enormous power of FAITH as we stumble and pick our self up over and over again.We owe nothing to anyone about life.

If there's anything that my siblings and I can prove,that is this one prime truth...: The amazing work of God, really exist. Well, that, I do believe.

but before, ask yourself. Do you really need to do it for them, or to your very self?

Catatan Pendek dari Perut Bumi

Dan kamu,
yang dengan kekuatan dan cerdasmu
bisa merubah dunia
bisa menjadikan anak-anakmu, tak lagi banyak yang bercita-cita jadi guru
yang bisa bisa menggelitik perekonomian, lewat ibu jarimu
dan mampu menggulingkan manusia lain, berpolitik, hanya melalui bisikmu...
kamu bisa merubah takdir lahirmu
bahkan untuk menjadi lelaki atau perempuan sejati kini adalah hakmu
yang bisa berkalkulasi, meramal bahkan menjadi seorang cendikiawan dalam menebak maunya alam 

Tapi...
Hanya aku yang paling tau kapan seluruh kemuakkan ini akan kumuntahkan
Yang paling tau hari,jam,detik kapan laut akan menjelma dinding tinggi
dan meraupmu tanpa sempat berpamitan
Hanya aku yang punya perjanjian tersembunyi dengan Tuhan....
Kamu tidak akan pernah bisa begitu...

captured by a dearest talented friend of mine

(Untuk saudara-saudaraku yang kehilangan,untuk jiwa-jiwa yang pergi tanpa berpamitan… Tuhan memberkati)

Puisi ini saya tulis pada suatu hari di bulan Oktober 2010. Hari ini, saya merasa alam sedang sangat bersahabat,sehingga  saya merasa perlu bersyukur. Dengan sangat.

Jailbreak oh Jailbreak

Just sharing.

On last Friday afternoon, on my way home from work- I found something that I thought would never ever happen to me. My i touch battery's dead!Why is that such a tragedy? I jailbreak my i touch. A jail-broken i touch cannot, must not run out of battery, otherwise you will lose everything in them. Every songs, games, applications! 

To share a little, jailbreak is a process that allows devices running Apple's iOS (also known as iPhone OS prior to iOS 4.0) operating system (such as the iPad, iPhone, iPod Touch, and recently Apple TV) to gain full access (root access) to unlock all features of the said operating system, thereby removing limitations imposed by Apple. Once jail broken, iOS users are able to download additional applications, extensions and themes that are unavailable through the official Apple App Store, via installers such as Cydia, one of a number of current means for older iPhones.

So yea... I spent the rest of my Friday at home- re setting my i touch, only to found the truth that I only have 66 albums as a back up in my macbook- out of the nearly 150 I used to have (not to mention all the cute, fun games and apps).Oh and I have suuuuchhh rare, quirky, difficult to find play lists! Irritating? Yes.

Letting go-online

Do you have a deceased friend(s) on facebook or on any other social media account? I used too keep those accounts of the deceased stays on my friend(s) list. Just for the aching pleasure of enlivening the memory it holds, whenever I want to.

But then I realize, what is the ( f word)  use out of it? I do not need to have someone who’s never going to respond to any of my comments; someone who’s never going to celebrate another birthday, liking my status or pictures ever again.

Simply,  because there's no one at the other end of this so called virtual connection. So, I deleted, removed, un-friend the deceased. I couldn't do it instantly, truth be told. There are some people that are so dear to my heart that I feel like I need to hold on to the documented chronicle for a little while. Even though I know I have no obligations whatsoever to write on their walls just to say I miss them every once in a while, sending virtual birthday gimmick, or be part of their irritating on-line games.

Now... Whenever I am reminded of them, I can share the feeling with ones living and also having the closest memory with the late.Like I said, not that easy. From all the passed on relatives, friends I have in my social media account, I still have a few of them on the connection list. It is far much easier to delete those people who keeps updating negativity, provocative comments! Seriously. Trust me, I do this cleaning up occasionally.

How about you? You have trouble letting go online? I can understand... Even we know by heart...No one is going to answer us. No one is on the other line.

Image credit unknown

Homesick- Mercy Me

You are in a better place I heard a thousand times. And at least a thousand times, I have rejoiced for you. But the reason why I am broken, the reason why I cry is how long must I wait to be with you? Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways.The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know. But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same. Cause I'm still here so far away from home. I close my eyes, and I see your face. If home's where the heart is, then I am out of place. Lord won't you give me strength to make it through somehow. I have never been more homesick than now...In Christ the are no goodbyes... In Christ, there is no end... So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have, to see you again. To see you again.

Believe it or Not ; Family

What is " family " to you ? Blood related people? People affiliated by consanguinity, affinity, or co-residence? Long time well-known relatives?
One thing that is considered as one of my greatest blessings is that the "blood related" version of my extended family is astoundingly close and fun. We stick up with each other no matter what. That leads to another blessing; most of my best friends are also close to my parents, grandparents, even uncles and aunts, not to exclude the long line of cousins, firsts and seconds.

However, despite the never ending hustle of birthday celebrations, grad days, firsts communions, births and many other milestones- my idea of a family is simple. They are those who you get to chose, to stay in your heart.  That's all. So the answer for me is YES. I am a die hard- big time- freakin' believer of Family.

My grandmother on her 75th birthday. with grandchildren and a great grandson. Sadly I couldn't attend the party, but grandma is wearing my kebaya and my songket (traditional handwoven sarong from Sumatra) here in this picture.

New Shades

I just stumble upon this page, when searching ideas about about how to "rainbow" your clothing :)) I am getting bored with my fashion sense these days and trying to look up for new style- or new shades. I fell for this one. Honestly, I never really imagine rocking a vamp red with an earth tone color can be this beautiful yet elegant. What do you think?

this page and j.crew

Will you know that it's me?

I never knew you. We never really met. But how come I have this feeling that no one understands me like you? Our eyes never gazed into each others', but how on earth that I can be so assured that your tiny dark eyes can melt my heart in a second and enlighten my most bitter past in a wink?

You didn't get to hold my trembling hand, I didn't get to nurse you. I did not even hear you cry...
Then tell me how can I have this clear picture of you and I, standing in front of your first school?
How can I be so certain of your dark as the night hair? Your heartbreaking tiny face and that you smell as sweet as rice and as light as a cotton field?

But why I did not get the chance to know if you like to walk on a grass when it's sunny outside... ? Do you? Because I do.
Are you afraid of bugs?
Do you love the smell of the rain?
Does the sound of the thunder excites you?
Can I at least capture your  smile, if I cannot treasure your laugh?

My ears are afar from hearing your stories, dreams, and fears.
But what is that sound that keeps me from walking across  the empty room?
Is that you? Are you asking me to stay? Do you want me to come to you?

We were inside of each other flesh and blood.
You and I. 
We harmonized in the same pulse, in every breath we take.
My heartbeat was your first ever melody.
Why does it have to be the last?
Will you remember me by only those?

It's alright. I don't have to understand this by now. I just need to let you know.
If I see you someday, in a place that only my deepest heart can ever imagine... I will not going to miss recognizing you.

But, ... will you know that it's me?

image from this talented artist

The Muppets!

Walt Disney Pictures has announced that the movie will be released in theaters on Wednesday November 23, 2011. To add, The film started production in September 2010. Principal photography for The Muppets began on October 30, 2010 and concluded on February 11, 2011.Theatrically, the film will be accompanied by a brand-new short film featuring Pixar's Toy Story characters.

Oh I so cannot waiiiitttt to see youuuu Kermit, Gonzo, Miss. Piggy, Fozzie and all...!

"Once Kermit asks you to do something it is really hard to look at him and say, 'No.'"
– Amy Adams, who received a personal invite from Kermit the Frog via DVD to join the cast of The Muppets, to PopSugar

from people

David Ogilvy-100 Years

I have always adore David Ogilvy . I actually have sent my resume to the representative office in Jakarta once. A few years ago... Wish me luck :) Hahaha...

So, this post is to honor a legacy, commemorating the 100 years of his life. Today, June 23rd.

David Ogilvy formed the agency that still bears his name in New York in 1948, and went on to produce memorable work for clients such as Lever Brothers, General Foods, and American Express.As a copywriter, Ogilvy was personally responsible for many of advertising’s most famously sophisticated campaigns. These include 'The man in the Hathaway Shirt', which introduced Baron George Wrangell with his aristocratic eye patch, and the series of advertisements for Schweppes featuring Commander Whitehead and the tagline 'The man from Schweppes is here'.
.

Via campaignasia

Easiest way to explain " How Genetic Works" to our children

I found the image here , the content has nothing to do with any genetic knowledge anyhow. It's just a thought that crossed my mind when I stumble upon this image.

Other people's opinion. Care much?

I used to. Now.. not so much.Well, it is easy to just neglect the judgement or opinion from others who are not that close to you. But somehow, you can have this urge of trying to make your dearests happy all the time. The habit to keep asking whether or not our decision is going to disappoint them. This aching heart of knowing that you did.

I know… That can eat you out alive at some point. I have been there. So, if you ask me… no… I cannot just not care. I love my friends, I love my siblings to death, I love my edgy Mom and my big big crazy family.
But I chose not to worry. People will not live that long to keep talking about you, you are no rock star! And even if you are, trust me… They do not think about you very often and you know the saying; What other people think of you is not your business.

When I decided to get a divorce , I didn’t expect people will just be in a solemn peace- not judging or over analyzing my “reasons why”. I cannot stop them from talking about me, pointing fingers to summarize me to fall into one template of a character. And that’s fine. I cannot control what they think of me and I am okay with that. The changes my decision bring, was like a gigantic drainage with little holes, only the strong headed with true hearts stays. And that is a good chance for me to know who my real loved ones are. I know If they really love you for who you are, even though they may not always understand you, they will stick around and get your back. Somehow.

And when you are surrounded with true people, how can it not bring all the best and most genuine qualities of you too?

Check this page for other inspiring rules

Tuhan... saya sedang marah

Tuhan saya sedang marah. Sumpah marah. Saya baru dengar cerita bahwa seorang umat yang baru ketahuan adalah juga seorang pendosa, tidak diperolehkan datang ke rumah ibadahnya di hari dimana anak dari umat tersebut akan mengikrarkan pengakuan imannya. Iman yang selama ini dikoar-koarkan oleh rumah ibadah itu. Iya, rumah ibadah yang saya maksud, ya rumahMu Tuhan.

Katanya perbuatan si umat sudah sedemikian degilnya, sehingga sebaiknya dia pergi saja, biar si anak mengikrarkan janji tanpa hadirnya.Katanya si pendosa tak lagi jadi teladan dan sudah terlalu memalukan. Jadi jangan sampai yang lain tertular perbuatannya.

Mungkin para pengurus rumah ibadah tersebut sebegitu suci ya Tuhan? Sudah tumbuh sayap perak jugakah di punggung mereka? Sudah sebegitu bersihkan pikiran mereka dari segala yang Kau benci, Tuhan?

Tuhan tolong saya karena saya marah sekali. Yang saya tahu bukan untuk menjadi tempat penghakiman, rumahMu itu diberdirikan. Apakah saya salah? Apakah saya justru sedang menghakimi? Dada saya sesak. Air mata saya tinggal menderu deras dalam sekali napas, bibir saya hanya sedetik lagi menuju serapah terkotor yang pernah terpikirkan. Kalau Kau pernah mengusir pedagang, penjudi yang mengotori pekarangan rumahMu, bisakah Kau perbolehkan saya untuk marah kali ini? Dalam hati saja Tuhan dalam hati saja. Saya mohon ampuni saya. Saya muak. Sumpah saya muak.

Believe it or Not : Devotion

A Woman. 45 years old. Been tied in a sacral knot for almost a half of her life. Been cheated for 12 freaking years. The betrayal started  on the same year when she gave up on her dream, to take care of their walking flesh and blood, another dream she has been carrying, proof of love she has been holding. Then she goes... Trying to make a living, saving, managing, organizing, cleaning, cooking, teaching, forgiving...  All she does. She puts on a face of glorify, whenever she talks about her man. His pride is on her rough hands.
Then she vanishes. She forgets. Wishing to be gone. Only her aching body, her wandered eyes. The living witness of a cruel life in disguise. Yet, she beams her smile again. Then keep trying to make a living... saving,managing, organizing, cleaning, cooking, teaching, forgiving, saving, managing,cleaning... Aching... Wandering. All she does.

from all posters

Note: I am posting this with a stomping heart because I am just so mad at this time and I need to get it out. If some wiser breeze effect me later, I will of course add something. But now, I think I have found a new meaning of Devotion. That is; it can be extremely sucks. 

You may kiss the Bride

I have been thinking about wedding kisses recently. Maybe because I attended my dear friend's wedding last week. The wedding was so sweet yet intimate.
Why again? Maybe because I just love an image that captures the object's emotion.

Are you married? What was the wedding like? How was the kiss?Did you do a big wet one at the altar? Or you think you should you keep it small and grandparent-friendly (as in; you sniff more than you smooch)? Have a look on a few lovely wedding-kiss moments below.

They look edgy and adorable!

She giggles! how cute is that?

Simply sweet and romantic

My sweet friend Ria and her passionate -cannot let go of the champagne glass- kisser husband, Adrian

Last... the Royal kiss and the slightly disturbed flower girl ;)

(Photos by  East Side Bride; Boutwell Studio; Parker J, and Anna Wolf) Ria's album and people

Believe it or Not: Marriage

For more than a handful of times, I have been asked with this question " Do you believe in marriage? " And for more than a couple of moments I have to wander around with my answer, just because I do not want people to get the wrong idea. Well let me make it clear now....I will try to say this as simple as I possibly can. 

Here we go... Do I believe in marriage? 
I have nothing against it. But, I believe more in appreciation, compromise, dedication, commitment and trust me… I am a big believer of Love. And those are the main elements of a relationship between two persons, whether they are married or not. 
So, that's that.

image is from here

A Click Away

Former sex workers take part in a photography class provided by a local rehabilitation center in Mojokerto, East Java, on Tuesday. The rehabilitation center, run by Coffee Community (Kanopi), is opening a three-month course for former sex workers and aims to publish their works at the completion of the course. (Antara/Arief Priyono).

source : the jakarta post

A Glimpse of Poland's kindess

My email address is stated in the press releases and homepage of the resort where I am working for, therefore I can easily be tracked and contacted. Not only by the media but sometimes by future guests who need details or other information prior to their arrival. I am in charge for Marketing Communications department and I handle all of the outgoing communications, mostly related to promotions. But, a client- guests can pop you any kind of regards and questions, so it is not really that limited.

There’s this couple from Poland. They emailed me like a few weeks before their arrival date- with their diet concern. They can only eat black-graham bread, and they are also lactose intolerant. 

So I forward the email to our Executive Chef who immediately responds that we don’t have that specific kind but will prepare them before the couple arrived. I reply the couple’s email saying the same, and ensuring their diet will be noted as our concern. Just that simple. I also send a reminder to Chef a week before the guest arrived.

But I didn’t realize that the small gesture mean so much to them. On the 7^th day of their stay, the couple , Mr and Mrs. Janusz Kurek , (probably at their 60’s) walked into my office and pay their courtesy. It was a sweet visit from such a lovely couple. They gave me a little coffee table book about Poland, a CD album of a young accordion player (Mr. Kurek turns out to be a famous musician in Poland, own a Jazz club, performed with Louis Armstrong and the accordion artist is his student), and a cute postcard with a picture of a painting by Tomasz Setowski (the exact same painting is hanging on the wall of Mr. Kurek’s Jazz club). I literally think it was just too much! They are sooooooo kind and I am more than just touched. Books, music and art are my main interest and they miraculously wrap them all in the package. It's like they know me for a long time before... And of course...their visit made my day...

I am Dying

There comes a time or moment once every now and then,when my body and mind somehow find its way to synchronize with a folder in my brain that automatically plays a song or visualize something that represents what I am feeling. Are you having that kind of thing too? This song by Five for Fighting is buzzing in my head the whole day. I am missing someone. Almost every people I treasure will easily guess it correctly. But I don't think I need to mention that here. I am just sharing you the sweet lyric and if you want to listen to the melody. As for me...I am dying.

I'm Dying, Dying to wake up without you, without you in my head again
I'm Dying, Dying to forget about you, that you ever lived
There's a shade come over this heart that's coping with laying down to rest
I'm Dying to live without you again

I'm Dying, Dying to find a distraction, get you away from me
I'm Dying, Dying to reach a conclusion, so that the world can see
It's the same old story of love and glory that broke before it bent
I'm Dying to live without you again

The first time you left I said goodbye
Now there's not a prayer that can survive

Dying, Dying to die just to come back so we can meet again
Dying, Dying to say what I always should have said
It's a strange emotion this but there's still hope in this
As long as there's a breath...
I'm Dying and I can't live without you again

It's a strange emotion this but there's still hope in this
As long as there's a breath...

I'm Dying and I can't live without you
I'm Dying and I can't live without you again

Tidak pada titik Nol

Salah satu kawan lama saya (yang sayang sungguh sayang susah sekali saya temui), memiliki bakat menulis yang luar biasa. Saya sudah lama curiga bahwa ada elemen di dalam otaknya itu yang agak miring sedikit. Karena dia sungguh cerdas. Di jurnal 'nya, kawan saya menulis sebuah artikel yang membuat saya meringis sekaligus terpesona. Silakan baca disana , saya hanya perlu mengutip beberapa baris dari paragraf yang telah sukses membuat saya mengernyit ngeri, dan menambahkan satu-dua baris dari pengalaman ingusan saya.

Di Iran, perempuan dilarang menonton bola di stadium.
Saya ingat jaman perhelatan Piala Dunia dari masa ke masa yang saya pantengi. Entah menontonnya di ruang keluarga, kamar, pun resto dan bar .  Bleum lagi pertandingan bola lainnya. Menyaksikannya di stadium bola ? Jelas pernah. Walau saya lupa piala apa (pastinya bukan Piala Dunia). Intinya, entah bersama rombongan sirkus, atau bahkan pernah hanya bersama almarhum Ayah saya. Saya tahu saya bisa berteriak sepuasnya, saya bisa mengoloki tim lawan, malah pernah taruhan. Yang kalah harus bayar ongkos pulang, atau traktir makan pisang bakar di pinggir jalan.

Di China, perempuan dilarang memilih sekolah sendiri.
Selepas lulus bangku SMP, saya mengisi formulir sekolah yang saya idamkan dan langsung mengajukannya pada orangtua yang tanpa banyak komentar- setelah mendengar alasan saya, langsung mengurus administrasinya. Saat kuliah apalagi. Tidak semua pilihan saya benar dan tepat. Buktinya, tempat kuliah saya dulu, sekarang tutup karena pailit dan akhirnya dibeli oleh instansi lain. Tapi yang saya tahu, anehnya hal itu tidak ada hubungannya dengan masa depan saya.
Sulit untuk meminta dunia mengerti kadang nama sebuah instansi  tidak ada hubungannya dengan masa depan. Sesungguhnya sampai kapanpun pastinya saya akan setuju bahwa sekolah itu penting. Tetapi yang saya takutkan adalah orang lebih percaya pada nama instansi dibanding kualitas manusianya. Teori yang terbuktikan oleh saya agak mengerikan. Contoh kasus kampus yang bangkrut tadi. Tapi... sudahlah...
 

Di Kota Baru, ibu kota negara bagian Kelantan, perempuan dilarang menggunakan lipstik berwarna terang dan sepatu hak tinggi ke tempat kerja.
Mau dikemanakan koleksi sepatu saya yang sudah se abrek itu? Termasuk lipstik beraneka warna yang memenuhi laci? Untung sekali saya ini bukan tipe perempuan yang digilai pangeran apalagi anaknya sultan.

Di Afganistan, perempuan dilarang mengeluarkan suara ketukan dari sepatu haknya, karena dianggap sebagai bagian dari aurat.
Tidak pantas saya berdalih soal batas aurat. Dan saya tidak mau. Tapi sekarang saya suka sepatu wedges atau espadrilles. Tidak mengeluarkan suara saat saya melangkah. Tapi tinggi dan pastinya postur saya akan sedikit terlihat lebih proporsional walau belum tentu aduhai. Kalau sepatu macam itu, boleh?

Masih mengutip, dan menyetujui. Itulah yang terjadi saat nilai moral telah menjadi hukum yang universal, nilai personal tidak lagi mendapat tempat. Sedikit saja ia mau menyelinap, langsung dituding macam-macam.

Fakta-fakta diatas mengingatkan saya pada sebuah buku tipis yang saya baca dulu, saat masih di bangku kuliah. Mengingatkan saya untuk bersyukur karena walau saya belum bisa membawa perubahan pada dunia, paling tidak saya tidak sedang berada pada situasi-situasi diatas. Saya ada dimana, belum pasti. 

Yang jelas saya yakin, saya tidak berada pada titik nol.

salah satu buku yang saya cinta

 

Italian-Inspired Summer Supper Menu

I read this on the fame Martha Stewart 's homepage. And now wishing to have a small pantry in the place where I am residing now, with a coffee machine of course. I don't think I have ever been to an eatery, bistro nor a coffee shop with this treat on the menu though. Well, if you are reading this and also living in Bali, would you mind telling me? Till then I think I can mix it up myself. Not sure if the taste will be just as precise but I will order both (gelato and an espresso , then do the trick while no one is looking :)

Affogato Recipe

A Poem reminder

Well, I know they don't have roses there in the bush where artist Pete Dungey plants gardens in the potholes on British roads. "If we planted one of these in every hole," he says, "it would be a like forest in the road.". But, rather than thinking about magical little forests, somehow this reminds me of the beautiful poem by Tupac Shakur . Even given the fact that the bushes did not grow by a nature's force . I simply like and love to relate to it.

Did you hear about the rose that grew from a crack in the concrete?
Provin' nature's laws wrong it learned how to walk without havin feet
Funny it seems but, by keepin' its dreams
it, learned to breathe FRESH air
Long live the rose that grew from concrete
when no one else even cared
No one else even cared..
The rose that grew from concrete

Fashion and art hand in hand

Agree? Yes. I am going to copy these style ... Maybe it is time to got to the flea market again (too bad they don't sell paintings there). Oh ya, I also found a Roman Holiday look alike skirt the last time I was there. Please go check out the post here to see the details of all the outfits & art. Me likey!

I am Nujood, Age 10 and Divorced

Tell me if the title does not shatter your heart into pieces.  I hate to tell you this but this is a true story from a radiant  girl with a gigantic courage, Nujood. When her family would not help her escape the horror her life had become, Nujood acted on her own. " I want a divorce" - are words that who would have ever thought will ever come out from a girl who's supposed to be at school and playing "tea party" or making a scrap book with you. But it did.

Nujood with Shada. "I'll do my best to keep him from hurting you again," the lawyer said, "but you must be strong." Photo: Hamed Thibet

This is her story:

My head is spinning – I’ve never seen so many people. In the yard outside the courthouse, a crowd is bustling in every direction: men in suits and ties with yellowed files tucked under their arms; other men wearing the zanna, the traditional ankle-length tunic of northern Yemen; and all these women, shouting and weeping so loudly that I can’t understand a word. It’s as if I were invisible. No-one sees me: I’m too small for them. I’m only ten years old, maybe not even that. Who knows?

People say judges are the ones who help people in need. So I have to find one and tell him my story. I’m exhausted. It’s hot under my veil, I have a headache, and I’m so ashamed.

I notice a man in a white shirt and black suit walking towards me. A judge, perhaps, or a lawyer? “Excuse me, mister, I want to see the judge.” “Over that way, up the steps,” he replies with hardly a glance at me, before vanishing back into the throng. My feet feel like lead when I finally step onto the marble floor.

I spy a group of men in uniforms. If they see me, they might arrest me. A little girl running away from home. Trembling, I discreetly latch on to the first passing veil, hoping to get the attention of the woman it conceals. “I want to talk to the judge.”

Two big eyes framed in black stare at me in surprise.

“What judge are you looking for?”

“Take me to a judge – it doesn’t matter which one!”

She stares at me, astonished.

“Follow me,” the woman finally says. The door opens onto a room full of people, and at the far end, behind a desk, a thin-faced man with a mustache. It’s the judge at last. I sit down, rest my head against the back of the chair and await my turn.”

“And what can I do for you?” A man’s voice rouses me from my dozing. It is a curiously gentle voice. I rub my face and recognize, standing in front of me, the judge with the mustache. The room is almost empty.

“I want a divorce.”

continue reading

Your Baby's hobbies

Here's another post about my nephew Joseph Kiyoshi. Just wondering, if you are a Mom of a toddler, what are the things that keep your baby busy? I am sure that your day can be just as heavy or maybe even more than a single working woman and you will appreciate a few minutes of being-left alone. Read a magazine, talk over the phone, drink a glass of wine or else. The thing is you know that you have to make sure your active little tot will not be bored or will have something to be given his or her attention too . At least for that so needed 15 minutes of "me time" you are desperate for. Well, if I may say....My sister is so lucky because her baby boy has many-many interests... :)

Books! This he reallllly loves

see?

napping with the dog

playing "drums"

and some other musical instruments

and playing dress up :))

Bukan Sebuah Studi

Saya baru saja bercakap dengan seorang kawan dan percakapan itu mengingatkan saya akan perbincangan dengan seorang dosen beberapa tahun silam. Dalam post ini, saya tidak akan memberikan resensi atau contoh studi kasus. Ini hanya akan menjadi catatan pendek , sebuah renungan ringan yang memang tidak memenuhii syarat untuk dikategorikan berat.

Bukan sekali atau dua saja saya dijuluki atau tepatnya diledek sebagai seorang feminist (ehm, sejenak saya tergoda untuk memberikan tautan untuk diunduh mengenai arti sesungguhnya. Tapi, lupakan).

Mungkin julukan itu saya dapatkan semata-mata karena saya memang banyak menulis dan bicara soal mahkluk saya. Bisa jadi juga karena saya bukan orang yang mudah menunjukkan ketergantungan pada kaum pria.
Tapi, sebenarnya dibalik itu semua, ada beberapa detil yang terabaikan;

• Lebih nyamannya saya bicara mengenai karakter, tokoh, permasalahan perempuan  semata-mata karena saya adalah kaum hawa dan pastinya tidak pernah hidup dalam raga laki-laki.
• Kemandirian yang saya tunjukkan adalah hasil kerja keras dan didikan almarhum Ompung Doli saya, Kakek- Andersen Simanjuntak. Tidak lebih dari itu. Terlepas dari kebiasaan beliau menyembunyikan lauk daging terakhir agar saya bisa makan dan menyimpan kaleng susu agar hanya saya yang bisa menikmatinya, beliau mengajarkan saya untuk terus berusaha dan tidak mudah berkata “saya tidak bisa”. Saya ingat pada suatu sore dimana saya diharuskan mengisi paling tidak 5 kolom mendatar dan 5 kolom menurun pada sebuah TTS harian ternama. Sampai mau copot mata dan otak ini…Tapi akhirnya saya bisa. Demi dapat jajan mie ayam yang dijual oleh bapak dengan gerobak biru.
• Pemakluman saya terhadap gagalnya mahligai pernikahan bukan karena saya tidak lagi mempercayai keterlibatan Tuhan. Tapi karena saya lebih percaya bahwa Tuhan memberikan kemuliaan yang sama besarnya pada hak untuk berbahagia dengan kemuliaan yang Ia curahkan pada pernikahan. Benar atau tidaknya teori saya bisa saya tanyakan pada Tuhan nanti saat tiba waktu kita bertemu. Jadi sekali lagi, tidak ada referensi.
• Saya pemberani. Itu kata orang. Saya begitu karena saya harus mengatasi ketakutan. Sumpah saya takut jalan sendirian di malam hari. Kalau saya harus naik taxi diatas jam 10 malam saya akan mengabari saudara terdekat saya nomor taxi yang saya gunakan, kalau adik saya belum pulang diatas jam 12 malam saya akan sibuk mengirimkan pesan, kalau nonton film horror, saya akan berdoa lebih panjang dan memastikan lampu baca tetap menyala sampai subuh menjelang. Jadi keberanian bukan sifat yang saya bawa dari kandungan. Keberanian adalah tindak kecil atau besar yang saya lakukan untuk mengatasi ketakutan.
• Tidak suka gagal. Siapa yang suka?... Tapi ada beberapa hal dimana saya tahu saya harus berhenti dan mengalihkan energi saya pada hal lain. Contoh sederhana soal belajar naik motor. Saya pernah mencobanya dan ternyata trauma jatuh serta reaksi berlebihan saya terhadap suara klakson kendaraan lain membuat saya sadar bahwa saya tidak akan aman berkendaraan ini di jalan. Hal lain? Nanti saja, terlalu berat untuk dibahas sekarang.
• Tidak butuh pasangan? Bukan begitu. Saya hanya tidak ingin pendamping tersebut ada karena sebuah keharusan. Saya tidak ingin dia ada disamping saya karena “tidak ada yang lebih baik”. Saya tidak ingin saya ada disamping dia dan membuat dia merasa dia perlu berubah, pun sebaliknya, saya tidak menginginkan seseorang tersebut membuat saya merasa harus berubah. Membuat saya merasa tidak cukup, atau membuat saya merasa saya ini terlalu banyak.
• Penyendiri dan pemikir?... Kalau iya seharusnya saya punya titel cum laude. Kalau iya mungkin saya sudah jadi ilmuwan. Ada beberapa saat dimana saya sungguh malas berpikir. Saya menikmati kesendirian dari waktu ke waktu karena saya percaya itu adalah saat terbaik untuk mengenali diri sendiri. Baik tubuh maupun jiwa. Sendirian ke toko buku sejatinya supaya saya merasa lebih nyaman saja. Sungguh. Supaya saya tidak harus merasa “tidak enak” terhadap yang menemani saya karena saya betah berlama-lama.
• Mengejar karir?... Betapa bersyukurnya saya pada Tuhan karena jabatan yang tertera pada kartu nama saya bukan hanya sekedar penanda upah yang saya terima setiap bulan. Tetapi karena saya menikmati setiap sudut dari fungsi-fungsinya. Menulis, fotografi, seni, kreatifitas. Tanpa unsur-unsur tadi, mungkin saya tidak akan sampai disini dan mustahil membayangkan akan dimana saya 5 dan 10 tahun lagi. Jadi bukan cuma soal jabatan. Ini soal hasrat.
• Apakah saya pernah tersakiti? Pasti. Tapi saya berharap kita tidak perlu menunggu sampai hampir mati untuk bisa bersuara. Saya berharap kita tidak lagi malu atau sungkan berbagi cerita atau berteriak minta pertolongan jika memang membutuhkan. Itu saja.Saya pernah begitu, sekarang tidak lagi.

Jadi teman, saya tidak sedang berusaha merubah penilaianmu terhadap saya. Seperti biasa, saya hanya hendak berbagi. Kalau-kalau kamu ingin mengenal saya lebih jauh. Karena sungguh, saya ingin mengenalmu lebih lagi.

Salam,

Tressabel

pertama dan sepertinya yang terakhir :)

Detrianie's Bar

As promised. This one is about you, Detri. A girl that is oh so fun to be with, a real hard worker, cute, kindhearted and funny. She is also the cook in the family! The picture is also taken from the recent holiday. At one of my recommended bar in Bali (again, I will keep some of my favorite spot as a secret- just some- although some of you may recognize the place from the picture). If Detri and her future husband are about to visit me someday I promise to treat them drinks at this place :)

Maharani's Beach

Maharani is the youngest girl in the family. She is petite, gullible,  and a bit quiet. The pet lover as well as the "pet" in  the family. In a cute way. She was here last week along with my other sister (I have 3 younger sisters and 1 younger brother) Detriannie and My mom and Grandma. Although she had to wait for about 3 to 4 years, she is now studying in one of the college in Jakarta majoring Secretary. She just quit from her job and now juggling time from one application and interview to another but still focusing on her study the most. This is one of the picture that I really love from the recent holiday. It was a few hours before their flight back to Jakarta but she insisted to go to this beach ( which I will not mention here- I am doing my part to make my special spot in Bali a secret and stays as remote as they possibly can). :). And, Detri, yes... there will be a post about you too!

All in the hand writing (?)

I am sure that there’s no arguing that laptops, iPads and smart phones enable us to communicate instantly. Surprisingly, according to a study conducted by Forrester Research, 87 percent of business professionals still use handwritten notes in addition to digital media. The study concludes that by integrating handwritten notes with digital communication, workflow and overall productivity increases dramatically. Think to-do lists, grocery lists (oh how I hate grocery shopping!).

Handwriting also has benefits for the writer.  Researchers believe that the simple act of constructing the letters and forming words and symbols on paper increases our ability to recall information.I myself, found only one way to memorize the best is by jotting it down first. Which also applies in my preparation for my exams back when I was a student, and when I was in college. No, I am not talking about making the small cheat sheets :), but the actual "studying" method I found comfortable with. 

What about you?

from this cute blog

Wish List

Yes...Here comes another post about things that I want and eerrr.... need to have. But I know we all have that little list we sometimes hide and correct. This one is more than anything, a must have- since photography is a part of my job and I have the skill in me.. I guess.. :) Another reason? I am a big time macro lens admirer, and the macro lens from Canon is somewhat affordable. And of course because this camera is affordable too! Well... soon baby..soon...