Oct 20, 2014

New Beginning

I am 45 minutes early, thanks to my early-riser habit! 
So, I am taking advantage of the smooth WiFi, very tasty coffee and the breeze to post this one.

Today is my first day working at the place that reminds me of how I started with the industry, a part of me feels like coming home... as many of the people here are long time friends and people I have known for years. Another part is feeling giddy and nervous as well as ecstatic!

Am I getting closer to where I want to be? The answer is, yes. Baby steps, but a new trail is in the making. Not a marvelous or triumphant victory, but I have won by being so sure of what I am doing, and the move I have made.

May God's grace stay within me. While I am taking one mental note on this one:
"Unicorns are everywhere. Jut waiting to be released...." Thank you, ADL.

Oct 18, 2014

Twin Flames

Wait, that's strange. 
You did not make fun of me ordering that purple-colored soda that's basically a can of sugar. You even ordered one for yourself. That's strange. You're basically a kid... like me.

The story from one of my favorite book, how the character would go on after the last page, I never mentioned that wonder to anyone else before... 
But to you, I kinda feel safe as you might wonder about the same thing.
"Movie... what's going to happen to Private Ryan's mother?" I asked... You did not think my question was weird. Maybe because you are also the same kinda weird as me.

Hold on... I have been here... smelly vinyl store, with you. No pretending. Old book store, new ones. Enjoy being alone and together in between aisles.

I got you that pencil that you paid for. Like a girl in a crush.

Me thinking that you got more truffle butter on your steak... I know I was making non-sense, you did too. But you let me have some of yours anyway.

I have met you before, I know that. 

Sometime, somewhere. In a different life and or form. 
Otherwise, there's no way I can easily enjoy being next to you for days every single second... not worrying how you would think of me. 
"You have seen me doing this before... " That's what I thought.

And you, hugging me from behind as am about to brush my teeth. You in white robe. Confirming our mutual feelings as if discussing what I want for breakfast.

I have seen you doing that before. And damn sure as hell, I will see you doing that again. Hugging me from behind as I am about to brush my teeth, different question, much more comfortable robe. Different mirror in different bath. 

But you. 

Oct 10, 2014

Things I want to tell my angel baby

Dear my angel baby,

I cannot change the painful-bitter fact that we did not get to know each-other... and that I did not even get to see your face, or hear you laugh and sing with you.

But, my angel baby, I know we will meet eventually.

And before that day, I have things to say to you. Things that maybe you already knew...

Sunshine is one of my favorite thing in the world. When it shines, its warmth touches you like a soft kiss from the universe. 
I imagined having you on my lap and we can just shower under the rays, I will tell you stories my grandparents used to tell me, we can share ice cream if you like. My favorite flavors are; Pistachio, Hazelnut, Coffee, and a combination of them three.
We will read together, day and night. I will allow you to pick your own clothes everyday.
There will be one room in the house where the walls are erected for you to color. However you like it.

Also, I am telling you... we will always have dogs. You will like their company.   

I do not like Italian food. And I always... always have a bad hand writing. I hope that does not get to you:). The handwriting, I mean.

I love the beach. And everything that it brings. Oh, how I wish I can tell you what the smell of the ocean likes, and how the waves make instrumental sound I think originally made in heaven.
Or, maybe you already knew?

There are days when I miss you so badly. I will cry and laugh at the same time. I mean, how can you miss someone you never actually met? Why is that even possible?

I bet you have a dark as the night hair. You got it from me. I am not sure on how you look like when you smile... I am aching in wonder just thinking about them.

Did I regret not having you? Angel baby... I do. I regret everything that we did not get to experience together.
I regret that I did not even have a chance to hear you cry or be there for you when your heart is broken. Regret that there will be no sleepless nights over books and movies and your endless questions about birds, and clouds and love and God.

But this bigger force that is beyond my understanding is now holding you. And somewhere in my heart I know, that is where you belong.
Until the day your eyes and mine will struck for the first and very last time.

Mutual first love, is what I am guessing to happen.

Till later.

Oct 9, 2014

Happy Feet

This is my "not a farewell note" to my colleagues at "The Place of Refuge". 
The content is self-explanatory.

Dear all,
If we were meant to stay in one place, we'd have roots instead of feet.” - Rachel Wolchin. (Longer legs, and a Chinese-princess’ feet, that's what I’d like to have if one could request) 

But I am thankful for having a healthy pair that’s now ready to move on. It has been an enthralling two and a half years, I am genuinely saying. That experience made me realize that I have to learn some more elsewhere while at the same time sharing what I have gained over the past time from each and everyone of you. I will always define AYANA & RIMBA as world-class product. But your friendship, your amazing team-work and leadership are the main core of it. All in all, the essence is YOU!

I am proud to carry its legacy on my resume and hope that I have left some values with you too. This is just my last day here at AYANA/RIMBA and it does not mean the same to our friendship.
See you in and around the island!

ps: Wish me luck!

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