Therefore, I write

I am not always good in a long winding conversation and not always comfortable being surrounded with lots of people. I have so many things twirling in my mind and sometimes have no single idea what to do with it.
Therefore, I write.

I am not a sweet tooth so chocolate does not entice my endorphin to burst as well as it does to anyone who is a choco aficionado.
But scribbling words while being caffeinated does. Therefore, I write (whilst coffee runs through my vein)

I do not always have time to hang out in a bar, not always in the safe zone to do a shopping spree, nor always in the mood for partying or do any other retail related therapy. But I always... always find it releasing, freeing, to be able to phrase a paragraph or two. 

Therefore, I write.

It is therapeutic. It is rewarding. It is a part of me that I will never question why and what for.
It is my way of telling you things I may never be able to say in person, or my method of asking you stuff I never thought I wanted to know in the first place. 

I am one confused soul and most of the time, I wander if I am not lost. 

I have a constant need to be found over and over again. 

Therefore, I write.

From Wendi K

Will you know that it's me?

I never knew you. We never really met. But how come I have this feeling that no one understands me like you? Our eyes never gazed into each others', but how on earth that I can be so assured that your tiny dark eyes can melt my heart in a second and enlighten my most bitter past in a wink?

You didn't get to hold my trembling hand, I didn't get to nurse you. I did not even hear you cry...
Then tell me how can I have this clear picture of you and I, standing in front of your first school?
How can I be so certain of your dark as the night hair? Your heartbreaking tiny face and that you smell as sweet as rice and as light as a cotton field?

But why I did not get the chance to know if you like to walk on a grass when it's sunny outside... ? Do you? Because I do.
Are you afraid of bugs?
Do you love the smell of the rain?
Does the sound of the thunder excites you?
Can I at least capture your  smile, if I cannot treasure your laugh?

My ears are afar from hearing your stories, dreams, and fears.
But what is that sound that keeps me from walking across  the empty room?
Is that you? Are you asking me to stay? Do you want me to come to you?

We were inside of each other flesh and blood.
You and I. 
We harmonized in the same pulse, in every breath we take.
My heartbeat was your first ever melody.
Why does it have to be the last?
Will you remember me by only those?

It's alright. I don't have to understand this by now. I just need to let you know.
If I see you someday, in a place that only my deepest heart can ever imagine... I will not going to miss recognizing you.

But, ... will you know that it's me?

image from this talented artist