I typed, deleted, re type a few paragraphs on this posting, biting my fingers in uncertainty that I may have written too much.
But this is what I decided to share:
When you hit rock bottom. You have nowhere else to go but... up. I heard that a gazillion times and maybe have experienced it in the count of hundreds, but at that very night... I just realized it with all my heart.
How could I not?
How could I not?
You may have been deleted, banished from a so-called ring of friendship, but that's only an end result of finding true one(s). You may not be able to connect with them in a way anymore...or , you are struggling through speeches just to break the ice, you do not get their jokes, you are flustered and confused... Trust this; that's simply because you have passed that bar. You are in a different world, another level. And that is where you are meant to be.
Yes, there will always be that little piece of sweet memories about them. Things you once thought will last forever, but apparently not. But let me ask you, if you are being asked to choose, to re-create those little sweetness, or create new one with people who are now proven to be real for you... What would you pick?
Yes you have been hurt. But as you are healed, don’t you realize that the process is taking you to a place way further than where you think you could ever be?
I may have less friends, but who's left with me today are the real one(s). How can I not be grateful? And I decided to be.
This pair of shoes I am wearing is not a designer labeled, but God has made a solid roof on top of my head. A home of my own. A result of years of hard work that may have never been accomplished if I did not stepped out of my past a few years ago, if I did not make that tough decision that has brought me to where I am today.
Those jokes don’t get me to laugh anymore, we are no longer in the same picture.
You and I particularly... are only a step away from being total strangers.
But if that's what it takes, for me to reach my fate.... I decided to letting it be.
I am here, at this very second...brought by millions of flaws and mishaps... is actually doing nothing but fulfilling my destiny.
And oh how I wish that's where you are too.