Jakarta Marathon 2016

Just a few days before race day, I know that my temperature has not been normal. All feverish and nausea with throbbing headache all day long. But I refused to stop myself from this race that I have signed up for.

After taking antibiotics and paracetamols for three days, I decided to just... do it.

"My siblings, Mom, Ompung (Grandma), my best friend, my in laws are going to be there at the finish line."I told myself as I pull my compression socks to my knees. 

Finishing 7 minutes slower than your previous personal best hurts. But I have learned to see every race that you completed as a PB. Why? First, the route is different. The weather, and the local people are too. I was spoiled with Ubud views in Lari Masuk Desa, and the cheering Balinese dancers in Maybank Bali Marathon. The 25KM long views in Lake Toba? Gosh, that one is a must to repeat.

I did not have those aforementioned perks in this race. To make things harder for mental endurance, there were not that many supporters cheering for you too. Some even honk you from their car even they have been informed about the road closure days before.

But you cannot expect a race to be "perfect" as per your liking, yes? Because, just like in the race of life, perfection is non existing. You need to allow the imperfection mold you. And if you are lucky, it brings out something in you that you never know you have.

In my case: apparently running 21KM under the rain is the best cure of all.

My siblings and cousin completed the 5K. I did the Half Marathon.

Entering the finish line drenched in sweats and rain. I remember thinking about doing a Full Marathon right at that moment.

Membawa Tuhan Dalam Sampul

Puisi ini saya tulis di tahun 2011.
Dan sayangnya, masih berlaku disaat ini.

Membawa Tuhan dalam Sampul

Ketika pemberontakkan semakin kehilangan muaranya

Ketika berita dan wacana lebih banyak memekakan telinga daripada menyercahkan harap

Saya memilih untuk membaca puisi-puisi tua, bermimpi masih ada negeri dongeng dengan kerubim dan tetua bijaksana di alamnya...

Ketika Tuhan dibawa-bawa

Untuk menjadi sampul pembenaran sebuah tindak anarki

Saya memilih untuk mendengarkan Dia lewat desir angin, melihat Dia di mata anak kecil saat mengagumi kupu-kupu, dan mengartikan gerimis sebagai airmataNya

Dia bilang, saya harus berdoa bagi yang mengkhianati saya

Dia bilang, saya harus sodorkan pipi yang lain saat ditampar

Dia bilang untuk tetap percaya dan jangan takut walau saya sedang melewati lembah kekelaman Dia yang Esa. Yang Maha.

Kalau Dia kuasa berkata seperti itu

Apakah mungkin Dia perlu lagi dibela?

February 2011

Androgynous

Just trying out a new look.

Have you tried an androgynous style? I am leaning into it but as I still enjoy being all girly and feminine, I do not want to overdo it.

I am so touched by how many people get isnpired by my style and sometimes some of them try to pull off a style the minute I shared about them. Thank you beautiful people.

My fashion-stylist friend told me that the first thing to take note is to know your body, do not force a style. You can get inspired by so many things around you but if you immediately copy them as soon as a trend comes in a hashtag, you might end up looking not as best. My legs are short, but I have a small waist so I can wear a high waist pants to create an illusion of longer legs. Minus looking bulky because my body frame is small.

My cheeks are chubby, so my big and frizzy hair will make it worse. Hence, the short cut.

PS: Do you think this look suits any body type?